Searching For Lost Love....

[SpoonEK]

What's da kine... umm, ok so it's been a while since I've been on the islands, but I still remember a very familiar face, the face of Terri Kagawa. I remember Terri as the pretty girl from Diaei. She is from Kailua side.

My name is Justin and I met Terri about four years ago. Yeah, a while eh? Well if anyone can contact her for me, or give her this information it will be greatly apprciated.... ;)

Justin Borja
AIM: YELOEK9
EMAIL: YELOEK9@netscape.com

[kamlost]

Heh.. I wonder if these are any of her numbers? 9410922 or 6230321

I did a quick search.

[pzarquon]

I'm not sure if posting to a public message board is the best way to reintroduce yourself to Ms. Kagawa. I definitely wouldn't recommend posting much more identifying information here.

That said, there are lots of tools you have at your disposal, not the least of which being Google's "Directory" feature, which nets two results (http://www.google.com/search?sa=X&oi=fwp&pb=f&q=T+Kagawa,+Honolulu,+HI) for "T. Kagawa" here in Honolulu.

[Glen Miyashiro]

Although I haven't actually paid money for one of their reports, Peoplefinders.com (http://www.people-finders.ws/Search) has a really impressive looking search engine. With online searches like these, it's amazing that anyone pays private investigators to find people any more.

[helen]

I guess finding information via the Internet is one thing, but actually making sure that information is accurate is a whole nothing thing.

[scrivener]

Ryan, I'm wondering if maybe kamlost's post should be edited. With all due (however much that is) respect to SpoonEK, we don't know anything about him or his intentions. I guess it's a high-wire you're walking in a public forum like this, but how liable are you for whatever might happen? Yeah, I know the information was easily retrieved on the Web, but now you and kamlost have actually gone and done (maybe) the dirty work on his behalf.

Perhaps posts like this should just be left alone, with no follow-up commentary; thus, all you do is provide the forum for SpoonEK to communicate his message; if T. Kagawa stumbles upon the message and decides then to contact him privately, then she can and the move is completely hers.

Not knowing anything about T. Kagawa (what if she's twelve?) or Justin, it seems best to err on the side of caution.

That's the teacher in me talking. Hope I'm not out of line. And apologies to SpoonEK and kamlost if what I've written offends.

[admin]

Your concern is natural and gives us a good opportunity to think about posts like this. We'll definitely see more.

"I'm Trying to Find Someone" messages are a tricky but traditional part of any open community, be it USENET, mailing lists, discussion boards like this one, or the ever entertaining "Missed Connections (http://honolulu.craigslist.org/mis/)" section of the Honolulu Craigslist site. Lost loves, old friends, classmates, and former military colleagues... people are always searching for links to the past. For Hawaii this sort of stuff is especially compelling, since everyone knows someone who knows someone anyway.

In fact, I was thinking of having a "Finding Old Friends" forum when this place got started. At sister site HawaiiAnswers.com, one out of five questions fit this category.

Fortunately, in this case, SpoonEK seemed to have a better understanding than most of how these things work.

He (I presume he's a "he") wasn't trying to collect information on his "lost love." He was, in fact, specifically asking people who might know her to get his contact information to her - meaning she would have the opportunity to respond or not. (Thus, posting phone numbers might not be the best idea... but these are also public listings that he could've gotten with one phone call.) This is definitely the preferred way to go.

Posting a name, a school, a workplace, and of course an explanation of the connection (where and when) and the reason? I'd say it's okay. She did this or he told my friend that? That would be more problematic. Or, in other words, trying to find a mutual connection? Good. Trying to snoop or gossip? Bad.

Perhaps posts like this should just be left alone, with no follow-up commentary; thus, all you do is provide the forum for SpoonEK to communicate his message; if T. Kagawa stumbles upon the message and decides then to contact him privately, then she can and the move is completely hers.
This, in fact, is probably the way to go. While I think it's unlikely the person being sought will stumble across the post themselves (until Google gets through with its next crawl, at least), the best response - if any - is, "I think I know this person. I'll let them know you're looking."

So no, people shouldn't ask us to drive past the guy's house and look for some girl's car, and we shouldn't offer, okay? :)

I'll probably try to develop a FAQ entry related to this, since it is something I expect we'll see now and then. If we do get a "desperately seeking someone" post that says just a little too much, we'll definitely step in (and would definitely appreciate a head's up, if even via a reply that politely says so).

[memorylane]

Thats how I found this site! Always wished i could locate my first love who was a soldier on Schofield Barracks when my family and I lived there. Best wishes!!

[mel]

I remember somebody from the 3rd grade who I still think about once in a while. Very, very, very, very distant now.

[memorylane]

Well, if anyone comes across the name LUSK there on Oahu, hollar!

[avekm]

You might also want to try checking out www.homegrownhawaii.com they have a lot of people from hawaii looking for others. Worth a shot. Alohaz.

[admin]

You might also want to try checking out www.homegrownhawaii.com they have a lot of people from hawaii looking for others.I see you also plugged this site (http://www.hawaiithreads.com/showthread.php?t=1046&page=3) in your only other post here at HawaiiThreads.com. We'd love to have you join our many conversations here, but please limit future advertising to your signature or to the "Selling (http://www.hawaiithreads.com/forumdisplay.php?f=57)" forum.

I'd also recommend that others visiting the site mentioned to read the user agreement (http://www.homegrownhawaii.com/agreement.htm) carefully. Especially since you need to register before you're allowed to explore any of the content.