The Annals of Dumb Customer Service

[pzarquon]

I'm picky about service. Certainly I'll reward good service when it's merited. I patronize businesses that have it, even if they don't have the best price. But I'll tell you, for a state so dependent on service industries, some of the ridiculous things customers are subjected to in this town are unbelievable. Forget "poor" customer service... this town is rife with downright "hostile" business practices.

I have dozens of stories. I'm sure you do, too. From cashiers that just throw your change on the counter to restaurants that require "minimum purchase" amounts before they'll take your plastic (which is against the credit card companies' policies, and you bet your sweet bippy I report 'em), some days I'm convinced supposedly struggling yet deserving operations don't want your business.

So here's the place to vent. Tell us who to avoid. And I'll start with an unexpected addition to my list.

The setup? My family and I have a weekly pizza tradition. Every Friday, we either go up to Boston's in Manoa, or we just call Papa John's for delivery. Always Papa John's, because I'm a sucker for that garlic sauce. Did I mention every week? We must've gotten two dozen pizzas this year so far, all processed by their McCully location, since they're the closest. We even order online, and voila, pizza guy arrives. Ah, city life!

So today, pizza day, I call, I place my order, they ask for a method of payment, I say check. We've always paid by check. We sometimes have to give a check number, or a social security number, but whatever. I'm very attached to checks.

For the first time in, easily, two years, they asked me what bank. I told them. They asked what bank address was on the check. Baffled, I told them. It was a P.O. Box. "We can't take that check." From this point on, things got incredibly unpleasant.

I told them it's a local bank. I told them the physical address of the bank. But he was resolute. No deal. I asked to speak to the manager. "I am the manager," he growled. Mark was his name. Mark just made The List. He said it was company policy. I asked, "Since when?" Always. "So let me get this straight. The last twelve checks, the last successful deliveries and the last processed payments we've done with your store were against policy?" Yes.

"No one has ever, ever asked me where the issuing bank was," I told him. I should have been asked, I said. "What are you worried about, that this local bank doesn't exist?" It's company policy, he said. He was just seething with condescention. I searched my phone in vain for the "strangle" button.

"Okay." Call over.

My wife, sadly, is of the more forgiving sort. She called twenty minutes later. Mark had suddenly changed his tune. "As long as the customer's street address is on the check, it's okay. We just can't take checks with P.O. boxes."

Why, why did we have to give him our business? Oh yeah, we hungry.

[dick]

Hunger or no hunger, I wouldn't have given them a thin dime.

When I get hassles at places I just tell them flat out that I'll be giving my money to someone else and walk out.

It's incredible that some people here have such a whack attitude towards customers. Cripes, we're paying their paychecks fercrissakes! And they have the gall to have a condescending attitude? It's like we're hassling them by wanting to give them money. I can never believe it when it happens. And trust me, I let them know about it.

[Mocha]

You'll never believe it but once I was asked for my passport in an upscale store!
I asked the person helping me...I'd just given them my charge card..."since when does an American need a passport to shop in America!" The clerk immediately apologized but I was VERY upset I had to count to ten in my head just to calm down.

[pzarquon]

Sounds like you were presumed to be a tourist, for whom a passport might be the most common piece of identifying documentation. Still, you know what you get when you assume...

My wife keeps track of where she's forked. You know, given a fork when everyone else at the table gets chopsticks, just because you're haole. The real irony is, I'm Japanese, but I'm lazy... I love forks! So usually I just trade with her.

[pzarquon]

I forgot to mention, David K. Choo has a brief column in the June 2004 issue of Hawaii Business magazine where he writes about businesses we have a love-hate relationship with: Sushi Sasabune, where the chef picks what you're going to eat. Costco, where it's crowded and there are no sales staff on the floor to answer questions. CompUSA where... well, pretty much everything that can go wrong will. And Oceanic, where system glitches blacked out thousands of televisions in 2002 (!).

I love CostCo, only rely on Oceanic for basic cable, and have never been to Sushi Sasabune. But I'll agree with everything bad ever said about CompUSA.

[Albert]

Oh well, as I've said before, SEARS gets my thumbs-down vote. I go there to buy some cheap on-sale item, just want to hand them my cash, get my change and leave. But I have to listen to a spiel about getting their damned SEARS card, etc., and one time the clerk even asked me if I didn't have coins!

(Once Walmart opens, SEARS may never see me again ... )

[DaFerret]

I can't recall a time when I had really bad customer service. The only time I get irritated is when I go to Ala Moana to shop and I'm dressed really casual. A lot of the workers there are all snobbish and wouldn't give me the time of day. At least until they spot my watch or I'm carrying a bag from a shop more expensive than their store. Back when I went to Heald, on days that I had to dress up, I'd go to some stores and they'd be all rear-kissing and placating.

Most of my recent irks come from a couple of restaurants near my workplace. One is mostly good except for one waitress who just doesn't get it and the other is either understaffed or completely ignorant of how many customers they actually have. But these are usually easy to avoid.

I have more "bad customer" experiences than I do of "bad customer service" because I'm super laid back and practically wait forever when I'm out shopping, mainly due to all the "eye-candy" outs and abouts.

As for Sushi Sasabune, my friend hates that place, but he admits that it has the best sushi he's ever had.

[Mocha]

Where is this sushi place? Is it upscale and in Waikiki? I don't mind if the sales people ask once if I need help but don't like it when they trail you around the store.

[Kilinahe]

Not going to tell them your Ken Fong story, Ryan?

I worked in retail for a long time, and I'm really embarrassed to say that my worst customer service nightmare stories are about things I watched my coworkers do. I watched female coworkers gossip while ringing up customers, not once acknowledging the customers' presence. I've watched a manager refuse to take a perfectly legitimate return on the grounds that the item was being returned one day after the end of the designated return period. I've seen some really ludicrous things.

On the other hand, I've also watched a customer return a three-year-old filthy, hair- and dust-clogged Vornado with no receipt.

[helen]

But I have to listen to a spiel about getting their damned SEARS card, etc.


I'm sort of used to the speech never mind the fact that I try repress the urge to tell them that after all these years being charged high finance charges by their credit card it's finally paid off and I don't plan on using their credit card again.

[pzarquon]

Ah, Ken Fong's. Chinese restaurant in Chinatown, quintessential hole in the wall. Still, a fixture downtown, and a good place to go "big kahuna" spotting.

The service there is rude, but usually quite entertaininglyso. I mean, there's actually a bit of relish when they mock or dismiss a customer. So I guess there are odd exceptions to my "bad service" rule... because in the case of Chinese restaurants, I figure that if they (1.) have bad service yet (2.) survive and do well, the food must be good. If the food's worth abuse, it's gotta be first rate, right?

Had another typical "local retail business" experience tonight, at a kitchen supply store that shall remain nameless because I actually like the place.

After waiting in line at the main register, and finally stepping up, we told them we'd like to buy a knife -- a $120 knife, mind you. But the cashier (one of perhaps sixbehind the counter, which is remarkable considering how slowly things got done) barely looked up as he gestured in the generaldirection of another counter and said, "She'll help you." A classic "not my department" response. And of course, there were four additional employees clustered around the second station, so "she" was pretty unhelpful.

"Who will help us?" I asked.

"She will," he replied, with disdain. Even other customers seemed pretty amused by the lack of attention.

"I'm sorry, but could you maybe take us to the person you're trying to point out?"

I was glad that Mr. Cashier then, finally, took a moment out of his horribly busy and urgent activities to holler at the coworker in question, who then proceeded to help us. (And rifled through four cabinets of unorganized merchandise for 10 minutes to find what we asked for.)

But, it was a nice knife, and the cashier that ultimately rung us up was especially friendly... and it wasn't really my money anyway. So heck, we'll probably be back. But it's stories like this that make me think, "If this place goes out of business, I won't be the least bit surprised."

[dick]

I've been to Sushi Sasabune on occasion (near the makai-diamond head corner of Keeaumoku and King) and knew what I was getting into in terms of the chef choosing what to feed you. So that wasn't really a problem. But this place uses warm rice, which isn't my thing (it was like eating rice that had been rolled around in some dude's palm for like, twenty minutes - and I couldn't shake that imagery the whole time). The fish was quite good, though. But when the bill came I was mortified at how much it cost. I can get stuff that's just fine for me at half the price at Tokkuri-Tei or other izakaya around town. The place just seemed stuffy and stuck-up and I don't really like feeling intimidated when eating. Needless to say I'll never go back there. It's just not my thing.

[Mocha]

Now you folks have really made me wonder about the sushi place, I've often wondered about the Chinese eateries...they always sound like it's a chore to serve/wait on you! And then they're probably talking about you too! Too bad I didn't go to all the language schools! It would be fun to write a book about what the wait help is really saying about their customers.

[kimo55]

I'm picky about service.

I have dozens of stories. I'm sure you do, too. From cashiers that just throw your change on the counter
change throwing is rampant!

Doncha luv it when servers come by and ask:
"you still working on this?"
One has the image of heaving, sweaty bodies shoveling food into a huge orifice.
No, I am not working. I am off work for the time being and and enjoying leisure time. Or at least trying to.
Some even are in the process of grabbing your plate while asking this inappropriate question.
Roy's and sometimes Compadre's has servers who come by I swear; at bout every 45 seconds saying:
"everything all right?" get choo sumpin else?" "how's errything?"
and of course, interrupting the conversation.
One server at compadre's even asked me
"Still working on this"
while I was obviously in the middle of my lunch! more than a half full plate.

and what of that habit of asking:
"do you need change back?"
are they trying to save a trip or looking for a bigger tip?
If I were GM of these restaurants, i would train da keeds; Just take the change back to them and accept what is left when they leave.
"Serve for the customer's convenience and comfort level, not yours!"

Chachacha is good healthy food and good service. The owner is a charmer. Love what they have done to the place.
But sometimes you get the dumb clerk routine:
now and then I get a tamale plate:
tamale beans and rice.
One day, wanted tacos which of course they have.
I asked for a taco beans and rice.
the reply;
"tacos don't come with beans and rice."
instead of getting me what i wanted, which they have on the menu, albeit ala carte.
I sometimes wonder about asking;
"do you want to sell your food, or would you rather tell me I am wrong?"

Some servers, I dunno why; are not trained to get the customers what they want. Just to memorize the combos on da menu I suppose. and not think past that.
It's like a previous post:
someone wanted a particular size bowl;
"we don't have that size"

time was years past in the restaurant biz, we were all trained to:
Never say "we ran out of that"
say " that's not available at the moment but may we suggest... it's similar" or it's "very good"
or whatevah. just gettem what they want. or they will spend their hard earned money at a more accomodating establishment.

(previously posted in kaukau corner)

[pzarquon]

and what of that habit of asking: "do you need change back?" are they trying to save a trip or looking for a bigger tip? Oooh, I hate that. I pause for a second and say, "Well, now that you ask, yes." Then again, I tend to overtip anyway, so usually the worst a server can get is 10 percent. I'm usually too scared of bad karma to leave a penny or something.
instead of getting me what i wanted, which they have on the menu, albeit ala carte. I sometimes wonder about asking; "do you want to sell your food, or would you rather tell me I am wrong?" Again, right on. We're regulars at one Zippy's, and usually get two keiki meals for our two kids, but only one (right now) is ever interested in dessert. Now, keiki meals come with only pudding or jello, not a bowl of ice cream (or cake or whatever) that adult meals get. But usually a server will be happy to give us one bowl of ice cream - which my kid craves dearly - intead two of the lesser desserts. But now and then, one of them will argue with me, like the FBI or CIA would suddenly appear if she bent the rules a little bit.

And I know they can't substitute something more expensive for something cheaper, which is why I "trade up" when I can, and when I can't, I'd happily pay whatever extra to upgrade. But rather than being offered the opportunity, some say, "I just can't do that." For cryin' out loud! You have it, we want it, why does this have to be so complicated?

[kimo55]

And I know they can't substitute something more expensive for something cheaper, which is why I "trade up" when I can, and when I can't, I'd happily pay whatever extra to upgrade. But rather than being offered the opportunity, some say, "I just can't do that." For cryin' out loud! You have it, we want it, why does this have to be so complicated?
rite.
je'like when ya ask for a heineken at about 6 or so, when maybe most people are there cuz the millers are 25 cents or sumpin.. So i say; I'll take a heinee, please.

OR..
I want cheese on my teriburger...

or whatevah..

And da wahine stands there like a judge at nuremberg with one hand on her hip and an almost sneer responding with:

"That's extra."
or
"that costs more!"

uuuuuh.
oookayyy,

howbout:
just. Bring. it. to. ME!

and then charge me. Whatever! Just get me what I order!

I swear.
dunno why they like to make so much delay and pilikia...
wait. these titas were previously employed at da rollerderby!
thass it!

[kimo55]

I can't recall a time when I had really bad customer service. The only time I get irritated is when I go to Ala Moana to shop and I'm dressed really casual. A lot of the workers there are all snobbish and wouldn't give me the time of day. At least until they spot my watch or I'm carrying a bag from a shop more expensive than their store. Back when I went to Heald, on days that I had to dress up, I'd go to some stores and they'd be all rear-kissing and placating.




if there is one thing i have learned in marketing and sales for the past decades, and all that i have read in on this subject thru the years;
NEVER judge a book by its cover.
It IS a truism; the more money one has, the more one dresses to suit oneself. Especially the selfmade ones. (others who work for some kind of corporation; ya gotta put on airs alla time)
...been there done that for years, you dress down for your own comfort level. esp. in the tropics.
After all the years, ya get tired of trying to impress and one becomes less image concious. so much less, that to draw attention to onself is not what one wants to do.

The hippiest or somewhat casual or even downtrodden appearing person in your average macy's could be worth quite a bit.