New Advertiser Editor

[Ron Burgandy]

Just a little bit more Gannett-bashing. This is so funny I have to pass it on.

I'm told the latest promotion was "like putting Major Frank Burns in command of the 4077."

http://mash.nill.cz/galerie/linville/16.jpg

Burns, AKA Editor Mike Platte, replaces "The Evil Nun," who several years ago replaced "Captain Hazelwood."

Gotta love the repressed humor and creativity.

Stay classy, Honolulu!

[Leo Lakio]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

"You tell 'em, Ferret-face! Frank Burns eats worms!"

[Jeffrey Green]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

I have to admit....you got a laugh out of me. I passed it on to Mark so I hope he has a sense of humor

[MadAzza]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

"Meet the new boss.
"Same as the old boss."

[Ron Burgandy]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

Oopsy, my bad. It's Mark Platte, not Mike.

Oh, Mike, Mark, Mick, Mork
Editor Platte sure looks like a Dork:

http://mash.nill.cz/galerie/linville/8.jpg

Can anyone pick out an appropriate Frank Burnsism for us:

Frank: I didn't come here to be liked.
Hawkeye: You certainly came to the right place.
Henry Please Come Home

Frank: Don't make me get unpleasant!
Hawkeye: I can't improve on nature, Frank.
Germ Warfare

Frank: I'm here to relieve you.
Hawkeye: You do resemble an enema.
Dear Dad

Frank: I think you will all agree that by trying to introduce more discipline, more order, I have hopefully made this a more enjoyable war for all of us. Leadership is a lonely business. Your Napoleons, your Kaisers, your Attilas the Hun, were alone there in the front office as I have been this week. I have thought of you. I know you have thought of me - but some of the notes in the suggestion box were really below the belt! I mean, why drag my mother into this?
Henry in Love

Frank, moaning that no one likes him: I've gotten thank-you notes from people I said I'd never see again.
For Want of a Boot

Margaret: They love you, Frank.
Frank: It was their hatred that fooled me.
For Want of a Boot

Trapper: That's an order!
Frank: A captain can't give a major an order!
Hawkeye: Then it's a threat.
Frank: Well, that's different. This was a great war until you guys showed up!
Crisis

Frank: I'm a pretty fair doctor myself. Ask any of my patients!
Hawkeye: We can't dig people up just for that.
Rainbow Bridge

Frank: What I don't understand is why do people take an instant dislike to me?
Trapper: It saves time, Frank.
O.R.

Frank: I have never cared, and at this point I don't care twice as much as I never cared before!
A Full Rich Day

Frank: I'm taking this to a higher authority.
Trapper: Aw Frank, you're not gonna call your mother again!
Mad Dogs and Servicement

A Korean on Frank: I don't know his name. He had what we call in Korea a real fertilizer face.
Payday

Frank: I wouldn't mind being a doctor if I didn't have to be around sick people.
Soldier of the Month

Margaret: You lied to me, Frank! That's worse than stealing!
Frank: Well, I happen to think that stealing is worse than lying!
Margaret: And you did both!
Frank: So I oughta know!
The Gun

Frank: I think it was Napoleon who said, "Without discipline, an army is no more than a bunch of guys all wearing the same colour clothes."
Potter: Napoleon?
Frank: Could have been Mussolini.
The Novocaine Mutiny

B.J.: On the very first day, Frank observed that the M in MASH stood for Mobile. So, he had us break down the entire unit and move it across the road.
The Novocaine Mutiny

Frank: The way I see it, unless we each conform, unless we obey orders, unless we follow our leaders blindly, there is no possible way we can remain free.
The Novocaine Mutiny

Stay classy, Honolulu!

[lavagal]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

I like Mark Platte, even if I have been dropped like last year's fashion statement by Custom Publications.

[buzz1941]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

I have heard that Platte represents the best that Gannett has to offer, so the folks up the street are lucky indeed!

[Ron Burgandy]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

Surely you jest

[datilapia]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

cheez whiz
is cheap
artificial
processed snot.

a poor
substitute
for
quality.

[whocares]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

au contraire. . . cheez whiz is perhaps the finest substance to grace the pantries of american families. . . you ain't lived until you've had the bac 'n' cheddar, my friend. . .

[buzz1941]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

Do not fall asleep with your mouth full of CheezWhiz. It will harden and your jaw will be glued shut. Yes, this reminds me of Gannett managers.

[datilapia]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

au contraire. . . cheez whiz is perhaps the finest substance to grace the pantries of american families. . . you ain't lived until you've had the bac 'n' cheddar, my friend. . .

[after smelling the Sex Panther cologne]
Veronica Corningstone: What is that smell!?
Brian Fantana: That's the smell of desire m'lady.
Veronica Corningstone: Ugh... it smells like a used diaper... filled with Indian food!
Brian Fantana: Well that is what desire smells like to some people.
Veronica Corningstone: I'm sorry I have to go.
Garth Holliday: It smells like a turd covered in burnt hair!
News Station Employee: It smells like Bigfoot's *(**!

[Ron Burgandy]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

By the beard of Zeus! Now THAT'S dialogue!

Stay classy, Honolulu

[agovgal]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

Do not fall asleep with your mouth full of CheezWhiz. It will harden and your jaw will be glued shut. Yes, this reminds me of Gannett managers.

Wait a minute.
How could you fall asleep with a Gannett manager ... in ... your ... mouth?
Unless you .... Oh, my! That's shocking!

[buzz1941]

Re: New Advertiser Editor

No, Cheez Whiz! Gannett managers can't keep you from falling asleep!