Is marriage endangered?

[AbsolutChaos]

Do you think marriage is doomed?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/8017908/...week/?GT1=6657

[Glen Miyashiro]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

Certainly not. Marriage is alive and well. At least, mine is!

But marriage isn't an inevitable event in your life any more either; you gotta want it. And even then, it's not guaranteed to be until death do you part, either.

[1stwahine]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

NA NA hey, hey kiss him goodbye...

Marriage is sacred. Two people who love, respect and treasure each other that they would die for them...ok, to a certen degree. For me, I met my late husband of twenty years (three kids) on a friday and married him on Monday. He needed his green card, my girlfriends and I needed money to pay for our penthouse in Salt Lake. He didn't give me any. It was a marriage ment to be.

He became my best friend, confidant, lover, patient, etc. till the day he died. Soon my son will be taking his wedding vows and celebrating with friends and family. At first, I hated the thought of him marrying his beloved...now, I wish them well and make it a point to be a good mother-inlaw and not the one from hell. To see him in love and being so happy is all that matters. Despite the obsticles that lies ahead, I know they will make it. I know in my heart.

Marriages will increase and survive. Our society is a family oriented one. Who knows, I may get married again someday...nah, joke!

Auntie Lynn aka Auntie Pupule

[helen]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

Do you think marriage is doomed?

I don't think so but then again I am no expert on the matter. Also I fail to see the reason why one town some place in the world is going to set the pattern for others to follow.

[AbsolutChaos]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

Also I fail to see the reason why one town some place in the world is going to set the pattern for others to follow.

Perhaps the better question is whether marriage as a life-long institution will endure. There have been studies done showing that arranged marriages last longer, have fewer divorces, and lead to further happiness, with a growth of love between husband and wife once children are born, since now the couple has more in common. On the other hand, these same studies indicate that "love matches" tend to have much higher divorce rates, with children being the final reason that the love deteriorates to a point of no return (reality intruding on the "romance" aspect of a marriage).

With the Westernized ideal of "true love" entering more into the the picture around the world, and therefore with less family pressure to marry the "right person from the right family," is marriage eventually going to be seen as another phase of life, something short-term? Is there going to be a continuous cycle, where the idea of marriage becomes passe, only to come back into vogue (kinda like when there was a resurgence of marriage rates after a period of "free love" and living together" in previous decades or when religion sweeps more into the foreground in politics?)

[Glen Miyashiro]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

It was a lot easier to stay married for life back in the days when you didn't live past 45 or so.

[jdub]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

I've never been married, but I can say that love alone is not enough to make it work.

[molokai]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

I been married 6 years. To me, mentally, being married is more "secure" than being single and "living in sin" as my mother says.

First, if my husband like mess around wit' somebody else, I can take his money. nah nah, seriously, I don't think marriage is any more in trouble now that I've read the article than it was before I read the article. Marriage is sacred, I agree, but to what degree will someone see its sacredness, who just wants to cheat? (did that make sense?) What I mean is, if I don't think it's sacred, and you do, who are you to tell me it is?

Heck, I don't know what I'm saying. I love my husband. Our marriage is strong. Besides, my brother is still young yet. Why would I want him raising my kids?

[Menehune Man]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

Having survived a failed first marriage and my second marriage is going strong at 13 years now, I feel people will always try or at least want to get married. Creating a true partnership is a main factor that's missing in alot of marriages. Of course it's 2 people, but if they're not willing to work together it won't thrive or survive. Long ago my first wife and I actually lived in a '57 VW campervan for almost 2 years and couldn't have been closer or more in love. Then fast forward 4 years, we're living in a house in Berkeley, own a 31' Sailboat, a Jaguar and most importantly a beautiful healthy girl and my wife was no longer satisfied. So she left. We need to follow through on our promise of "Till death do us part". I don't want to write a book here so that's it for now.

[MadAzza]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

Gays destroyed my marriage.

[Glen Miyashiro]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

Gays destroyed my marriage.

Hot damn, finally PROOF POSITIVE that those damn gay boys are corroding the very fabric of our society.

What's next -- human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria?!

Sadly, I suspect it's necessary to insert this:

[alohabear]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

I think it's doomed if people forget what marriage is about. Not one culture on the planet allows marriage between the same sex. IMO marriage is only between a man and a woman. If anyone on this board can show me proof of a culture that allows same sex marriage it will be a first to me( i'm not talking about a law, like in canada...but a practice).

[Glen Miyashiro]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

I think it's doomed if people forget what marriage is about. Not one culture on the planet allows marriage between the same sex. IMO marriage is only between a man and a woman. If anyone on this board can show me proof of a culture that allows same sex marriage it will be a first to me( i'm not talking about a law, like in canada...but a practice).

If something is legal, doesn't that mean that it's allowed? Same sex marriage is legal in the Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, and the state of Massachusetts already, and Canada pretty soon. Don't those count? I'm not sure exactly what distinction you're trying to make here between "law" and "practice".

[kimo55]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

The concept is not clearly understood by many.
Too much of the population rush to the altar. They marry for the wrong reasons. they marry too young. Children having children. Idiots who have no business getting married and having kids. and even the concept that a marriage "failed"... what does that mean? IF two people love each other, and the union is good for a while and they drift apart, that marriage was a success for the time being. But if one has an unrealistic perspective and takes these contemporary vows literally...
"oh damn we weren't together until death us do part! we are divorcing! we failed" then a failed marriage it is. It ain't a failure in my eyes, if two people learned and grew and now, even tho they may be apart, they are wiser and more of a loving person with more patience and greater capacity of loving and sharing.

[Miulang]

Re: Is marriage endangered?

There's a difference between a marriage and a legal union. A marriage is blessed by a church, but has no legal standing. A legal union is one which has been acknowledged by the state as a kind of binding contract (i.e., you go to City Hall and get a license, but you don't have to be married in a church for the union to be a legal one). By the same token, no minister would marry a couple unless they had a marriage license and call it a wedding. It might be called a "commitment service" but it wouldn't be called a wedding.

Gays can have legal unions, where such ceremonies are recognized by a state, but they can only be married in religions which recognize gay wedding ceremonies.

Seems to me that if more people took the "legal union" part of their wedding vows more seriously, they wouldn't enter into holy matrimony quite so quickly.

Miulang