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I'm a lady, darn it!

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  • I'm a lady, darn it!

    I was at traffic court the other day, wearing a nice skirt and blouse, high-heeled sandals, hair nicely done, makeup —the works — and during a break in the proceedings I walked out of the courtroom to warm up. Those courtrooms are freezing! Anyway, I walked out and there were several benches for people to sit on. The benches were filled with cops in blue. Other than that, the hallway was empty. When I walked out, all the officers noticed me (I was the only thing going on at the moment, and I guess they get pretty bored sitting there waiting for their cases to be called). Not one of them stood up to offer me a seat, they just sat there staring at me.

    Right or wrong, it bothered me a little that not one of Honolulu's finest could get off his butt to offer his seat to a lady in 3-inch heels. I guess I'm a little old-fashioned in some respects. On the other hand, I can understand if a cop has to sit out there for two hours, he might not want to lose his seat. Or maybe they just thought of me as some perp or miscreant.

    Just wanted to get that off my chest. Got my asbestos suit on (without heels), so flame away!

  • #2
    Re: I'm a lady, darn it!

    One time at some supermarket there was this lady who had both arms full of bags (the paper ones)...Anyway, she's was having a hard time trying to get her key in to open her trunk with both arms still carrying the bags. So I walked up to her and said "Here let me give you a hand". Then she said "I'm quite capable!"... not no thanks or something polite. I was like "oops" then walked on (hoping she would drop her bags...lol).

    I guess chivalry is a thing of the past.

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    • #3
      Re: I'm a lady, darn it!

      Originally posted by cezanne
      Then she said "I'm quite capable!"... not no thanks or something polite.
      she's cap able.
      shoulda capped her.

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      • #4
        Re: I'm a lady, darn it!

        Originally posted by MadAzza
        Just wanted to get that off my chest. Got my asbestos suit on (without heels), so flame away!
        Traffic court and by all accounts dressed well. Three inch shoes? Good looking I assume? Well, many of our men in Blue worked 12 hour shifts the night before or are going on a 12 hour shift. I find it not out of ordinary that they would want to look at some beauty than the beasts that they usually do. Take it as a compliment...or next time, give me a call. Guarantee different action. They'll get their okole's off so fast! LOL

        Auntie Lynn aka Auntie Pupule
        Be AKAMAI ~ KOKUA Hawai`i!
        Philippians 4:13 --- I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

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        • #5
          Re: I'm a lady, darn it!

          Chilvery died with the advance of the Women's movement and the National Organization of Women. To them men are dirt. I wasn't shocked to find out that the leader of NOW was a lesbian.

          Anyway with our society being such a litiguous one I can understand why a cop wouldn't gesture his seat to you. One could take that as a sexual come on and because they were already trained in gender sensitivity, they could lose their job if a woman took that gesture offensively as Cezanne found out.

          Better to just be fair to all and stay out of trouble. That's how our society has become where everyone's scared to lend a hand for fear of retribution.

          It may look of ignorance or indifference in your eyes, but to a cop they've been spit on and accused by every walk of life. So a great pair of legs and heels won't get them to jump outta their seats for fear of retribution.

          It's a sad but heck the same set of rules that protect a woman from sexual harrassment are the ones that limit you to the same lack of chilvary a lot of women still demand in this modern non-discreminatory world. You can't have it both ways. If you want chilvery then expect sexual bias at the same time.
          Life is what you make of it...so please read the instructions carefully.

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          • #6
            Re: I'm a lady, darn it!

            Craig has a point, but I take it one step farther. It's called using "common sense" and showing "civility".

            For instance, I'm a wahine, and if I saw another wahine who was hapai dragging a little child along with her on a crowded bus, I would offer her my seat. Same thing if I saw an elderly person who was having difficulty standing or moving around.

            All bets are off, though, if the person looks physically able to stand without falling down. And yes, I understand that opening doors for a woman is no longer required, and that's OK with me. What's NOT OK with me is that some employers still pay women less money for the same job, just because they think the woman is only working for "pin money" and not because she might need the money to survive. And some companies refuse to advance women's careers because they think that all women want to be on the "mommy track".

            Miulang
            "Americans believe in three freedoms. Freedom of speech; freedom of religion; and the freedom to deny the other two to folks they don`t like.” --Mark Twain

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            • #7
              Re: I'm a lady, darn it!

              I once held a door open for a young woman at a mall here in Hilo. She started berating me telling me she didn't need my help. Before she could walk thru the door I let it go slamming it on her petite little toes. "Bitch" I told her and walked away.

              I open doors for everyone even able-bodied macho braddahs because it's just being civil as Miulang said.
              Life is what you make of it...so please read the instructions carefully.

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              • #8
                Re: I'm a lady, darn it!

                Originally posted by craigwatanabe
                I once held a door open for a young woman at a mall here in Hilo. She started berating me telling me she didn't need my help. Before she could walk thru the door I let it go slamming it on her petite little toes. "Bitch" I told her and walked away.

                I open doors for everyone even able-bodied macho braddahs because it's just being civil as Miulang said.

                Heh, good one, Craig. It's inexcusable for someone to be that rude. (Her, I mean.)
                Yes, I open doors for everyone, too, and offer my seat to whoever's older, or looks like he/she needs it (that's why I mentioned the heels, I didn't mean to imply I'm a spoiled babe!). I guess since I was older than several of them (and female), I hoped one of the young cops would have stood up, but I'm not too upset about it for reasons you and others discussed here. I figured it would be a good conversation starter in HT!

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                • #9
                  Re: I'm a lady, darn it!

                  Originally posted by MadAzza
                  I didn't mean to imply I'm a spoiled babe!

                  snot what I heard!

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                  • #10
                    Re: I'm a lady, darn it!

                    Three-inch heels? Probably looked pretty damn good standing up. But still, rude of Our Finest.
                    Last edited by buzz1941; July 18, 2005, 09:20 AM.
                    Burl Burlingame
                    "Art is never finished, only abandoned." -- Leonardo Da Vinci
                    honoluluagonizer.com

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