Serious question on dating a single parent

[Pua'i Mana'o]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

What a fascinating discussion.

Having both of my parents in committed l/t relationships, I am in the camp that believes what is best for a kid is to see her parents have primary relationships that are healthy, from which said kid can latch on. It wouldn't have been fair to me if I became the center of my divorced folks' world.

Today, watching my teens start to separate from their parents' nest is both tinged with sadness AND a reminder that teaching boundaries by providing them is an accomplishment.

[SouthKona]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

Her specific views are hardly uncommon (mothers shouldn't work, extramarital sex is wrong, no one should date before age 18), but her insistence on black-and-white absolutes is ridiculous...

Gee, I LOUDLY agree that "extramarital sex is wrong" - at least I would not want MY spouse having extramatital sex !!

[TuNnL]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

My own virginity, in my opinion, is a sign that there is something right with me, and I know quite a few women who agree with me. Chastity is not a disease, whether you believe in it or not. If I go out and just have sex with the next willing partner, does that mean whatever could be wrong with me is suddenly fixed?

Please allow me to give you some moral support on this one, scriv. I’m sure there are many women and fellow virgins of either sex with similar motivations who have given you encouragement. I myself am not a virgin, but as a single guy, I sure wish I could take it back. To me, it’s just a painful reminder of a failed relationship (including serious consequences related to this topic) or a mistake that didn’t seem like it would be at the time. The emotions truly haunt you if religion is an important part of your life.

I am much more careful about sex now. Maybe I’ve just grown up. But I can’t help thinking, if I had just respected the bond that God has given us between two life partners half as much as my animal instinct, I might be a better person for it. I think pre-marital sex is the real disease. Could it be harder to abstain once you’ve done it? A whole new thread for debate...

[damontucker]

Please allow me to give you some moral support on this one, scriv. I’m sure there are many women and fellow virgins of either sex with similar motivations who have given you encouragement. I myself am not a virgin, but as a single guy, I sure wish I could take it back. To me, it’s just a painful reminder of a failed relationship (including serious consequences related to this topic) or a mistake that didn’t seem like it would be at the time. The emotions truly haunt you if religion is an important part of your life.

I am much more careful about sex now. Maybe I’ve just grown up. But I can’t help thinking, if I had just respected the bond that God has given us between two life partners half as much as my animal instinct, I might be a better person for it. I think pre-marital sex is the real disease. Could it be harder to abstain once you’ve done it? A whole new thread for debate...

Is this the TuNnL that I know????

My god... I'm laughing so fricking hard....

YOU.... hahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahaha

i can stop laughing for a second....nope... i can't...hahahahha

In all seriousness... sheesh... no can stop laughing....

I thought it was that you couldn't get someone all this time?
I never knew you was so innocent?

I was kidding a bit when I posted this you know....

Manoa

[Pua'i Mana'o]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

Dude, is sex so worthless to you that you would find this funny? Or do you just lack the necessary proteins on your DNA for class and tact?

[1stwahine]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

Manoa, That was uncalled for.

I'm a Single Parent. When I lost my husband my children were teenagers. I mourned my late husband two years before I met a man of my choice. My children accepted him despite his downfall. I was lucky he didn't harm my girls and me. However, he did eventually in other ways. You know the story.

Now that I am Single again. My children's advice to me is to be more careful in choosing someone. They tell me I am more deserving to find someone who will appreciate and take care of me. I blush cause I know I no can find dat kind of person due to my personality.hahahaha

Yeah. I'm single and living on my own. I'm Independent and Strong. If it happens ~ it happens.

Who cares?

As long as I'm happy.

It's great to be back on HT!

Auntie Lynn

[TuNnL]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

SouthKona - you were right. This is a sad day. I am joining the ranks of the ignorant.

<ignore>mānoasurfer123

[lavagal]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

SouthKona - you were right. This is a sad day. I am joining the ranks of the ignorant.

<ignore>mānoasurfer123

TuNnL:

If I can quote myself in another thread called "ignoring other users":

Same here. And if I did put the one person I'd like to ignore on my ignore list, then I'd probably wouldn't get to read much because this person has to act like a dog and mark every single thread going. So I just skip 'em. Not worth it.

I just don't get it. Just be assured no one's laughing with him. At him? Probably. But not with him.

[damontucker]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

Dude, is sex so worthless to you that you would find this funny? Or do you just lack the necessary proteins on your DNA for class and tact?

It was a lack of class and tact. I know TuNnL from back in the days when he was pledging to a Fraternity and getting girls was a prime objective of
a lot of the Dorm Guys at the time

Manoa, That was uncalled for.

It was... my bad Auntie

<ignore>mānoasurfer123

Tunnl I'm glad you have chosen to change your ways.... I know you from our college days more than 11-12 years ago and chasing girls was part of the game.

I'm glad you have changed your ways....and with that said...sorry for posting that...

My mind was racing back to OUR partying days.

Hugs...

Manoa

[i-hungry]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

Would you? Wouldn't you?

Is she hot?

[Mike_Lowery]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

Is she hot?

Hahaha...that's immaterial in this discussion
At least I know.

[i-hungry]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

Well its something to inspire you when you face those problems related to the situation.

I had a neighbor that was in a similar situation. She had two kids. I don't know what her personality, character or talents are but she is a looker.

[SouthKona]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

SouthKona - you were right. This is a sad day. I am joining the ranks of the ignorant.
<ignore>mānoasurfer123

Yes, TuNnL, since I have started utilizing the IGNORE option, I get to be free from seeing what are probably offensive and/or idiotic postings by some (well, one). Try it, everyone. "Ignore" works!

[Shan-n]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

I say go for it! As a single mom, I have met a few guys who did not want to get involved with me because I had a son. I didn't hold it against them because I understand how much is involved when dating a single parent. Keep in mind when dating a single parent they have a lot on their plate. I am a mommy before anything else and I want the person I am dating to understand that. I don't go out too often during the week because I have priorities and mommy stuff to do like help my son with his homework, make dinner and spend time with my son. I never introduce my son right away to anyone I am dating. My ex boyfriend was divorced and had 2 boys of his own. But I waited 7 months before introducing my son to him and his children for fear of my son getting attached to them. Our relationship ended but I am happy with how we introduced our children to each other. Most of the guys I have dated did have children of their own. I find it is easier because they understand what it is like to be a parent.

[sinjin]

Re: Serious question on dating a single parent

Of course you're entitled to your opinion, but there are people who, for whatever reason, are 40 (or nearing 40, as in my case) and virgins and don't have a darn thing wrong with them.

No offense but with respect to "normal" sexuality you are hardly qualified to say there's nothing wrong with them.

It baffles me that people think that whether or not someone has had sex is a way to determine whether or not there's something wrong. My own virginity, in my opinion, is a sign that there is something right with me, and I know quite a few women who agree with me. Chastity is not a disease, whether you believe in it or not. If I go out and just have sex with the next willing partner, does that mean whatever could be wrong with me is suddenly fixed?

I don't feel chastity is a virtue either. All I'll say is that it is well that middle age virgins save themselves for each other as they would likely be unsatisfying for the more experienced of us. I assume your own virginity is an extension of your religious sensibilities. I would ask what do you find rewarding about abstinence?