Doing a Nice Thing for a Not-Nice Reason

[WindwardOahuRN]

Re: Doing a Nice Thing for a Not-Nice Reason

When I'm walking my dog I'll clean up anonymous poop if my dog hangs around the poop long enough to look like she might have left it there.
And yes, I do it for the same reason Scrivener wipes the seat. I don't want anyone to think that I didn't clean up my own mess.
Addendum: Well I guess I do it because it really is the right thing to do, too. But if I was really concerned about doing the right thing I would run around cleaning up all the poop I could find, maybe. Maybe not. Would I clean up her poop if I was in the middle of the desert and no one would ever attribute the poop to me or mine? Probably not. Then again I might.
So what does it all mean?
I think I am having a Jack Handey moment....

http://www.deepthoughtsbyjackhandey.com/

[SusieMisajon]

Re: Doing a Nice Thing for a Not-Nice Reason

Actually, I wouldn't worry about it...all of us do things so that we'll be liked/accepted by others. Like wear clean underwear 'just in case you get hit by a car and have to go to the hospital'.

It takes a whole lot of living before you can learn to either not give a darn or to enjoy the joke.

[SusieMisajon]

Re: Doing a Nice Thing for a Not-Nice Reason

Tell me some of the other things that you do...

[MyopicJoe]

Re: Doing a Nice Thing for a Not-Nice Reason

I like the philosophy of Enlightened Self-Interest:

EVERYTHING we do is selfish. If you do something "selfless" it's because it makes you feel better (for instance we internalize our parents' voice, constantly feeling their approval / disapproval).

There's nothing inherently wrong with being selfish. It's good to benefit from your actions. The question is do your actions benefit others? Do your actions at the very least do no harm to others?

[LikaNui]

Re: Doing a Nice Thing for a Not-Nice Reason

Hey Scriv, you can avoid having to do that very easily -- sit down, instead of standing!

(Is that a whole lot of females I hear applauding?)

[lavagal]

Re: Doing a Nice Thing for a Not-Nice Reason

At work there was a toilet that wasn't flushed. IT was as though women had tried, but didn't succeed. So women would go in, say EWWwww and go to another stall. So I figured, what's the deal, checked it out and pushed the button because the photo sensor wasn't "reading" correctly. Fixed it with a few flushes. I don't feel right for leaving anything behind, so I'm guilty of multiple flushing. I, too, wipe the seat, but hope that there are liners available! I don't do it for me, I don't know who I do it for, but I do it to leave a spot cleaner than when I got it.

Another thing I do is walk along with seniors or moms with little kids when we're crossing the street. I find that I do that a lot over on Keeaumoku near my offices. I just don't want them to feel alone or vulnerable. All I do is smile, or wave my hand to let them know I'm with them, then I move on.

I don't do these things for me, but I will admit that I enjoy a little fun vibe for having done them. You know that insurance commercial where someone does something nice for somebody else and an anonymous witness sees it and then tries something like that for themselves? I'd like to think that those of us who do these little things relay how easy it is to make someone else's day, and that whoever sees it tries it themselves.

[tutusue]

Re: Doing a Nice Thing for a Not-Nice Reason

I think there's something within universal laws that states one should "give" unconditionally. (I'm too lazy right now to do a search!) Still...to my tutu way of thinking...any act of kindness is worthy. I wouldn't say your reason is "not-nice", Scriv. Rather, I'd say it's a bit conditional and that's not always a bad thing. Just my 2 cents. Feel free to give me change!

[scrivener]

I feel a little weird discussing this here for some reason, but it's been bugging me, so I guess I'll ask the HT masses for an opinion.

Okay, I do this really weird thing. When I'm using a unisex bathroom, such as at a cafe or at a friend's house, I wipe the rim of the bowl when I'm finished peeing. I'll wad up a bunch of toilet paper and do a quick (not psychotic) wipe, and if there are droplets on the floor in front of the bowl, I'll wipe those up, too, even though those droplets are never mine, thank you very much.

I think this is a good thing. I don't think a woman should have to deal with that nastiness when there are so many other nastinesses brought about by men. It's sort of a do-unto-others thing, even though my real motivation is that I cannot stand the thought of some woman using the restroom after me and thinking whatever's there is MINE. I shudder at the thought of being considered a pig by the woman who sees me exiting the restroom, even when I don't know that there's actually a woman waiting to use the restroom.

What I am trying to say is that I do this pretty-good thing only because I'm worried that if I don't, people will think ill of me. If I could be totally sure that nobody would ever think the mess in there is mine, I don't think I'd worry about it, unless it were someone I knew, because I haaaaaaate public restrooms and would rather just get OUT of there as quickly as possible.

A courtesy like wiping the bowl is a small courtesy of very little importance, but a selfish, vain heart is quite vile.

So respond to the poll. Is this admirable, is it reprehensible, is it somewhere in the middle, or do the actions and motivations essentially cancel each other out?