Bad week/night

[adrian]

My Mom just came back and she didn't go to the hospital. Instead, she got her bag stolen with all of her credit cards, checks, our SSNs, etc in it!

Both me and her have been canceling cards left and right, but half of them needs her (the primary account holder) to cancel it! She's so stressed out right now, and if the companies didn't need her verification, then I'd do all of those myself.

At this rate, I might burn out and might not make it tomorrow.

[Miulang]

Re: Bad week/night

My Mom just came back and she didn't go to the hospital. Instead, she got her bag stolen with all of her credit cards, checks, our SSNs, etc in it!

Both me and her have been canceling cards left and right, but half of them needs her (the primary account holder) to cancel it! She's so stressed out right now, and if the companies didn't need her verification, then I'd do all of those myself.

At this rate, I might burn out and might not make it tomorrow.

Oh crap, Adrian. That really sucks. Don't get too stressed out. You'll just make your mom even more stressed out than she is already. You have a list of all the credit card numbers and the phone numbers to call, yeah? And tomorrow make sure she goes to get another driver's license and SS#. Does her bank have a 24 hr customer service number she can call tonight? Otherwise, first thing tomorrow morning gotta call.

Where was she when her bag was stolen? If you go back and look around there, look in the trash cans or in the bushes in the area because sometimes all the thieves want is cash and they ditch the rest of the bag...then you know it was for drug money. And when she gets everything replaced (that's the biggest pain in the okole ), tell her to only carry ONE credit card and ONE gas card and leave all the other cards at home unless she knows she needs to use it someplace. I had my purse ripped off once too, and that's the major lesson I learned. Also I learned to make sure I had a list of all my credit card numbers and the phone number of each card's customer service dept.

Good luck. People who take advantage of others in order to feed their drug habits really piss me off.

Miulang

[adrian]

Re: Bad week/night

Oh crap, Adrian. That really sucks. Don't get too stressed out. You'll just make your mom even more stressed out than she is already. You have a list of all the credit card numbers and the phone numbers to call, yeah? And tomorrow make sure she goes to get another driver's license and SS#. Does her bank have a 24 hr customer service number she can call tonight? Otherwise, first thing tomorrow morning gotta call.

Where was she when her bag was stolen? If you go back and look around there, look in the trash cans or in the bushes in the area because sometimes all the thieves want is cash and they ditch the rest of the bag...then you know it was for drug money. And when she gets everything replaced (that's the biggest pain in the okole ), tell her to only carry ONE credit card and ONE gas card and leave all the other cards at home unless she knows she needs to use it someplace. I had my purse ripped off once too, and that's the major lesson I learned. Also I learned to make sure I had a list of all my credit card numbers and the phone number of each card's customer service dept.

Good luck. People who take advantage of others in order to feed their drug habits really piss me off.

Miulang

She can't even think straight at the moment, so I just told her to calm down. If I had a car, then I'd go down to the hospital area myself and search for the bag and report it missing to security.

[Miulang]

Re: Bad week/night

She can't even think straight at the moment, so I just told her to calm down. If I had a car, then I'd go down to the hospital area myself and search for the bag and report it missing to security.

She was at the hospital, on the way in to see your grandpa? What did she do, put her purse on top the car roof while she was locking the door? Or did someone run behind her and grab the purse that way? Call the Hospital Security tonight, as well as file a report with the police so you at least have that ball rolling. Can your Dad kokua and take you down there to look around?

Miulang

P.S. The areas around hospitals especially are typically filled with less than desirable people (lotsa drug addicts, etc) who hang out there. It's probably safe for your Mom to go visit your grandpa by herself during the day, but when the sun goes down, please accompany her or have your Dad or some other adult go with her just in case...she only lost material things (although it will be a pain to replace them) but she didn't get hurt.

[tutusue]

Re: Bad week/night

$h%t comes in spurts, so to speak. Take this latest setback one step at a time, Adrian. Maybe make a list of everything that needs to be done, prioritize the items then plug away at them, one by one, checking off each item as it's completed. Makes it a bit more manageable and less overwhelming that way.

Please be sure to report this incident to your mom's bank so they can flag her account. Your mom should also periodically check her credit report for any unauthorized activity. A police report might also be a good thing to have.

I've never had to cancel a credit card so am not aware if phone notification needs to be followed up with written notification. If that's the case, possibly you could type a brief form letter on your computer leaving pukas to fill in the credit card company's name, your mom's account number and a line for her signature then print out several copies.

The School of Hard Knocks is always the toughest education of all but one that produces the greatest learning experiences. Hang in there and know you'll get thru it...one step at a time. And, reflecting on your other situation with your grandpa, if you feel like crying, just do it. Don't hold it in. Tears cleanse the soul.

[adrian]

Re: Bad week/night

Well, I found out that she went to Long's Drugs in Waipahu before she stopped by the hospital to get some food for my grandma and she said she lost it between when she got to the car, and the car trip to the hospital. She remembers having the key in her posession, along with her bag as she approached the car (which I searched). And a few minutes ago, we went back to longs and asked the security guard there and went to Blockbuster to ask them to keep an eye out (she was a frequent visitor, so they know her number). I searched through the garbage, in the carts, and I'd search the store too if it wasn't closing.

All I can do is just hope the cards and Social Security Numbers don't fall into the wrong hands.

[Glen Miyashiro]

Re: Bad week/night

Well hell. That sucks.

[adrian]

Re: Bad week/night

And, reflecting on your other situation with your grandpa, if you feel like crying, just do it. Don't hold it in. Tears cleanse the soul.

Just before I typed that other thread, I was like a waterfall. My grandpa actually was a second Dad to me and my older brother: always taking care of us when we were little, and letting us help in their small jobs around the house.


I just hope that this won't result in an immediate decline in anything, especially my health. I'm walking on very thin ice here, and if tomorrow, I get a caller that just had it with the transition, I may just erupt.

[SouthKona]

Re: Bad week/night

Don't give up hope yet. A family member lost their wallet last week, and we called everywhere we'd been that day, but no luck. Then, yesterday it pops up in a friend's car.

Cancel the credit cards that were lost, close the checking account if checks were lost, make a police report (you can do it over the phone) so if it is turned in they can contact you. There are many honest people out there, hopefully one of them will find the purse and turn it in or call you. Give it a little time .... good luck.

[tutusue]

Re: Bad week/night

Just before I typed that other thread, I was like a waterfall. My grandpa actually was a second Dad to me and my older brother: always taking care of us when we were little, and letting us help in their small jobs around the house.

I just hope that this won't result in an immediate decline in anything, especially my health. I'm walking on very thin ice here, and if tomorrow, I get a caller that just had it with the transition, I may just erupt.

Adrian, I'm going to mention a simple breathing exercise that's helpful in stressful situations. It won't eliminate your feelings of stress but it can help to mellow you just a bit...
Inhale to the count of 8 (completely fill your lungs with air)
Hold to the count of 4
Exhale fully to the count of 8
Repeat 2 more times.

If you start feeling the adrenaline taking over again, repeat the above. And continue to remind yourself that you'll get thru this tough time. It's temporary...even tho' it doesn't feel like it right now. Life can really suck sometimes.

[scrivener]

Re: Bad week/night

You don't need my advice, Adrian, but in times like this, the surest way to avoid a meltdown is to put yourself at the service of others in the same situation. If you focus on what you can do for your mother, for example, you don't have a lot of room for focusing on your own trouble. Perhaps this is not truly dealing with the situation, but it works for me.

[dick]

Re: Bad week/night

I've lost wallets/credit cards many a time... as long as you get in touch with the card issuers, there's nothing really to worry about. You are not responsible for so-called "unauthorized" purchases, so keep an eye out for weird transactions on the statements...

While it's all water under the bridge at this point, it might be helpful to others reading this that it's best to keep the social security card and unneeded credit cards in a safe place at home. Losing a bag or wallet that carries everything in it is a tragedy. After I lost mine, I was sure to leave everything at home.

And don't get too freaked out, the few times I lost my wallet, I always got it back... with the money and everything in it. There are real people left in this world...

Oddly enough as I was walking to get some coffee today, I stumbled across a First Hawaiian Bank debit card sitting happy in the middle of the street. I walked right by and thought "ooohhh, a debit card.." then stopped, thinking "hmmm that's not right..." and picked it up. It was right by the ATM at FHB in Kaimuki. It was already 4:45, but I ventured to the bank doors and after some coaxing (they must have thought I was on crack), got a teller to come to the door so I could hand it over...

[Surfingfarmboy]

Re: Bad week/night

I told the readers of another BBS of a lost wallet incident that happened to me about 2.5 years ago. Having read of your family's recent torrent of bad luck, I think you ought to read about what happened...if this can happen, brah, anything can happen..perhaps all is not lost..or stolen.

(Copied verbatim)

Want to hear a REALLY freaky lost wallet story? I'll tell you one.

In December of 2003, I was out running my usual 13 mile run in Bristol, RI. I had just come back, maybe 3 days or so eariler from my annual trek to Hawai'i to run the Honolulu Marathon as well as visit my mom and what friends I had left in the islands. (Since the inception of fora like this and HT, I have happily increased the number of people I can call as friends in HI dramatically) During the run, I found a wallet. I stopped to pick it up, looked in it briefly, and saw that there was quite a bit of cash in it, along with IDs, credit cars, etc. Since I was less than two miles from home, I stuffed it into the handwarmer section of my sweatshirt, and figured I deal with getting the wallet back to the proper owner when I got back home.

I get back home, and start doing my investigation. The wallet had over $125 in it, a couple of credit cards, the usual grocery cards/library cards, and all those kine cards, and a Colorado driver's license of a really sweet looking 19 year old girl from the Denver area. There was also a current and valid University of Hawai'i-Manoa ID with the same girl listed on the driver's license on the card listed on the UH-Manoa ID.

I did a quick internet search and found a last name matching the street and town of the ones listed on the driver's license. I was sure I found at least the family home of this girl. So I called the telephone number listed on the database, and I believe, in hindsight, I was talking to this girl's mother. I had explained to the presumed mother that I had found a wallet belonging to a girl, maybe her daughter, (I gave the mother her name) in a small coastal Rhode Island town, and was wondering if she had perhaps lost it on a trip out here. The mother said "Just a minute..let me get her for you". In the time between the phone was handed off between the mother and daughter, I clearly heard the mother say in an agitated tone (words which I wasn't supposed to hear) "What were you doing in Rhode Island?"

The girl came on and was flabbergasted to learn that I had found the wallet, intact with all the money, cards, IDs..even the pocket change and a coupon good for some Zippy's chili that she had bought at a fundraiser was still in the wallet. Based on the info I gave her, the wallet was 100% intact.

It turns out this girl had NOT visited Rhode Island. The fact of matter was that the wallet had been stolen from her during a party she had attended in Diamond Head two weeks early and the Honolulu Police had a stolen property report on file. She couldn't believe I had found it Rhode Island. Neither could I. I almost wet my pants when heard the news that it had been stolen. The first thing on my mind was "OMG..the HPD are going to be coming after me"....after all, I am in possession of a wallet that had been reported stolen to the HPD and I had just been in Honolulu when the wallet had been reported stolen. I mean, what are the odds I'm going to just "find" a UH-Manoa student's wallet randomly, while out running in Rhode Island, having just returned from a three week visit to Hawai'i just three days earlier?

I told the girl that this was too freaky...just tell me where you want the wallet sent to. I don't want anymore details. And so I did. I sent the wallet on to her in Colorado..she was on winter break, and that was that as far as I was concerned. About a week later I got a thank you card from her with an explantion that she had no idea how the wallet made it to RI from Hawaii after it had been stolen. The girl never had been in RI...she was definitly in Honolulu up until winter break, then flew home to Denver.

I still think about this. How could wallet stolen in HI make it to RI INTACT, with absolutely nothing missing, only to be recovered by someone who just had visited HI three days earlier? What are the odds?

Fortunately, all ended well, the girl got her wallet, and the HPD did not come calling me! It was too weird!

[MadAzza]

Re: Bad week/night

People who take advantage of others in order to feed their drug habits really piss me off.

Miulang

Really? Didn't you just say, in the Hilo cops thread, that robbery and assault aren't serious crimes? We should feel sorry for the poor lil thang, dontcha know! He might have had a good reason for ripping off your mom! Like, maybe he knocked up his stupid girlfriend and needed the money to take her to the food-stamp office.

[MadAzza]

Re: Bad week/night

It was already 4:45, but I ventured to the bank doors and after some coaxing (they must have thought I was on crack)

Well, honey, just *look* at you.