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Would You Rather Perspire Fluorescent Green Sweat or Fart Blue Smoke?
Re: Would You Rather Perspire Fluorescent Green Sweat or Fart Blue Smoke?
I go with the blue fart option. Flatulence, in any color, is truly a "passing" phenonama. It comes; it goes. About the only negative about it that I envision, is that somebody might ask, if the fart was dealt anonymously (and if it's possible to deal blue farts secretly) in a crowded room is: "Eh..who wen (blue) fut?" Farts come and go. Green sweat, I'm afraid, with the potential staining issues, might poses significantly more problems.
Re: Would You Rather Perspire Fluorescent Green Sweat or Fart Blue Smoke?
Blue Futs would look awesome. But I agree with Surfingfarmboy that it would be hard to sneak in a silent one with the blue cloud coming out of your butt....
Would add to wise old sayings like "Don't eat yellow snow"
"Don't enter elevators with blue air"
Whoa, Mista Buss Driva, eh, you can stop the buss o wat?
So why do farts smell? Fermented food produces different types of fumes, some of which smell. Flatulence contains odorless gases, such as nitrogen, carbon dioxide, oxygen, and methane, but it also contains the "oh-so-nasty" hydrogen sulfide, which causes the smell. If you have not noticed by now, some of the aforementioned fumes are flammable, like methane and oxygen, so you can, in fact, burn farts. Yes, you can set them aflame; it is not a myth, and a great way to impress the girls too... you do know I'm joking?
How much odor is produced also depends on the food you eat. Vegetarians might fart as often as meat-eaters, but their "serenades" do not smell as much because vegetables produce less hydrogen sulfide. The more sulfur rich the foods you eat, the more your farts will stink because bacteria will generate sulfides and mercaptans as they break down the nutrients. Beware: even though cauliflower is a vegetable, it also makes you stinky, so watch out!
Re: Would You Rather Perspire Fluorescent Green Sweat or Fart Blue Smoke?
I don't perspire much.. so I chose that one.
Rethinking it however.. if you perspired fluorescent green it would be quite visible for the rest of the day until you washed that shirt.. whereas a blue fart could be done in the men's bathroom without any women seeing that one and then gone away forever!
I should have chose the blue farts.. could be more fun.
Re: Would You Rather Perspire Fluorescent Green Sweat or Fart Blue Smoke?
Originally posted by helen
Which one gives out the less offensive smell? Also when you fart the blue smoke is there some kind of sound effect that goes with that too? Is there some kind of dependency with regreads to the volume level of the sound the fart makes, how bad the smell is and the size of the blue smoke when it comes out? Does the blue smoke stain your underwear? Can you switch choices, like today you perspire the Fluorescent Green Sweat and tomorrow you Fart Blue Smoke? Does the Fluorescent Green Sweat glows in the dark? Could you use it as hair gel? Does it come out from under your arms or from your forehead?
HAHAHAHAHA! Your post gave me a much needed laugh!! I'm still giggling.
Or asparagus. How come asparagus makes your pee stink that way?
When questions like this arise, I always say to ask Cecil. Asparagus doesn't affect us all this way, as the article says. It's genetic! Blame your folks.
But I'm disturbed! I'm depressed! I'm inadequate! I GOT IT ALL! (George Costanza) GrouchyTeacher.com
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