Suspended for Swearing?

[buzz1941]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

Q: Why do Scots wear kilts?

A: Sheep are spooked by the sound of zippers.

[LikaNui]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

Q: Why do Scots wear kilts?
A: Sheep are spooked by the sound of zippers.

Ahhhh, good old Scotland... where men are men, and sheep are nervous.

[Leo Lakio]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

Ahhhh, good old Scotland... where men are men, and sheep are nervous.

Hard to find virgin wool, however.

[Frankie's Market]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

Hard to find virgin wool, however.

Too much virgin wool today = No wool tomorrow

Let me tell you 'bout the birds and the bees
and the flowers and the trees,

[Leo Lakio]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

"Honestly, constable - I was just ... helping this sheep get over the fence!"

Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase: "on the lam(b)."

[LikaNui]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase: "on the lam(b)."

And also to any comments about anyone feeling sheepish.

Dammit.
(Disclaimer: the word "dammit" has been placed herein as a semi quasi pseudo swear word in order to stay on topic and avoid the dreaded thread drift.)

[buzz1941]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

A Scotsman clad in kilt left the bar one evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked he'd drunk more than his share
He staggered on until he could no longer keep his feet
Then stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.

chorus:
Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.

Later on two young and lovely girls just happened by,
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
You see yon sleeping Scotsman who is young and handsome built
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath their kilt.

Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath their kilt.

They crept up to the sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Then lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
And there behold for them to view beneath his Scottish skirt
Was nothing but what God had graced him with upon his birth

Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
There was nothing there but what God gave upon his birth

They marveled for a moment then one said we'd best be gone
But let's leave a present for our friend before we move along
They took a blue silk ribbon and they tied it in a bow
Around the bonnie spar that the Scot's lifted kilt did show

Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
Around the bonnie spar that the Scot's lifted kilt did show

The Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled toward a tree
Behind a bush he lifts his kilt and gawks at what he sees
Then in a startled voice he says to what's before his eyes
He said, "Lad I don't know where you've been but I see you won first prize"

Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
I don't know where you've been but I see you won first prize

[Leo Lakio]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

Bryan Bowers does a great version of that damn song; so does Mike Cross.

(Following LN's fine example, my use of "damn" is a f#*kin' cheap-@$$ attempt to stay vaguely on-topic.)

[LikaNui]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

I don't know where you've been but I see you won first prize

Ah, dear friend Burl, wanna know who really won first prize in this thread?

Ewe did.

[buzz1941]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

Ah, dear friend Burl, wanna know who really won first prize in this thread?

Ewe did.

Well, Damn!

[Leo Lakio]

Re: Suspended for Swearing?

Ah, dear friend Burl, wanna know who really won first prize in this thread?

Ewe did.

(sing-along time) ---
"Embrace me...my sweet Embraceable Ewe..."
Isht! There I go again!
It's fortunate that profanity is tolerated in my workplace - otherwise, it would be an empty room.