Ladies and gentlemen: How do you feel about cohabitation?

[Mike_Lowery]

Re: Ladies and gentlemen: How do you feel about cohabitation?

So if a couple cohabitates (?) and they have a child, who's last name will that child bear?

And to make things more confusing, the child has a mother and a father, but neither are husband nor wife. Does that make that family dysfunctional?

Then how do other family members relate to an unmarriage? "She's my brother's girlfriend not my sister in-law".

Then there's the Family Leave Act. If the girlfriend get's pregnant can the boyfriend use the family leave act to take unpaid leave?

What about pension plans? When I die my wife get's a partial amount of my monthly pension every month. Do girlfriends qualify?

Now if the couple splits, can the girlfriend collect anything other than child support (if there is a child).

And then there's the issue of probate. When the boyfriend dies and leaves no will, can the girlfriend collect?

Now what if the boyfriend buys a home under only his name and his girlfriend lives with him forever. Then the boyfriend dies with no will or trust. The boyfriend's family is the beneficieries under probate and is the new owners of the boyfriend's home. They have every legal right to kick the girlfriend out of the home she's lived in for as long as they were a couple. Same goes for his bank account, pension, social security, and anything under his name.

Marriage has a purpose. Oh love is one of them too.

I thought the purpose was just s--never mind

Good insight, everyone. I'm not imposing my feelings on this subject or looking down on anyone, I was just wondering what everyone's feelings were on this board.

[Leo Lakio]

Re: Ladies and gentlemen: How do you feel about cohabitation?

So if a couple cohabitates (?) and they have a child, who's last name will that child bear?

Any name they want - there's no legal guide to this, only the precedent of tradition. My first ex-wife, with whom I have a daughter, re-married and had a child with her second husband. They later divorced, and she went back to her maiden name. So for several years, the three people in that household had three different last names (my daughter has since married and taken her husband's last name.) This was all done within a matrimonial context, and never caused any problems.

And to make things more confusing, the child has a mother and a father, but neither are husband nor wife. Does that make that family dysfunctional?

Definition of a dysfunctional family = it has more than one person in it. Those are only titles; the love between family members trumps naming conventions.

Then how do other family members relate to an unmarriage? "She's my brother's girlfriend not my sister in-law".

An "unmarriage"? Please... Most open-minded families relate to the love that they see, and aren't so hung up on how to describe it. Craig, if one of your wonderful sons happens to be gay and falls in love with a man - and you can clearly see that they are in love - how will you "relate" to their relationship? With the onconditional love of a father, I would guess. You won't care so much about how to put it into words. "Partner" works fine for some.

Most of your other points can be answered easier in communities that recognize domestic partnerships, be they heterosexual or homosexual. Welcome to 2007.

[craigwatanabe]

Re: Ladies and gentlemen: How do you feel about cohabitation?

It's nice that open minded families don't need the context of language but for the rest of society that doesn't know, context is important.

But for practical purposes, I get it now thanks.

[speedtek]

Re: Ladies and gentlemen: How do you feel about cohabitation?

I think it is important to have some legal paperwork regarding financial support should one unmarried partner die. I have seen it happen and it is not pretty if specifics are not laid out. no matter how selfish one is they must think of thier offspring.

In Thailand if you are living together you are considered married by your family, unless you are married already.