Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

[Leo Lakio]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

"POOTAAATOOOE"

For your first post on HT, that's a mighty good one! Mahalo!

[adrian]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

Mo'bookbook jokes:

- What you call one filipino who walks his dog? A vegetarian
- What you call one filipino who walks 5 dogs? A rancher
- What do you call a couple of filipino pilots? A pair of pliers
- If I'm a book-book, what you call my kids? Booklets
- If one book-book marry one black person, what are the kids? Color Book
- What do you call a filipino origami maker? Manila folder

I actually had to run into the bathroom and LOL

Its always nice to tease your own race.

[sinjin]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

I'm still chuckling about the "pair of pliers" one. Classic.

[Dale]

Re: Going Loco for Logos

Choose soft or crunchy at



What's on the menu you may ask?

Soft or Crunchy Tako of course.

Also Tako Poke Tako's.

Takostadas too.

I looking for the tako bell logo. Anybody can either send 'um to me, or show me where to get it? It was great, but when I went back to get 'um, it no stay!!! Thank u!!!

[speedtek]

Re: Da "Tree" Locals Crossing Da' Desert

This is a classic that if not mistaken was made popular by Frank DeLima...

Had da' Hawaiian, da' Japanee and da' Podagee. As they were crossing a desert they passed out from thirst, hunger and heat.

When they woke up da' Hawaiian guy said, "whoa brah I had one awesome dream that we had 3 full coolers of ice cold Budweiser beer!".

Da Japanee guy said, "whoah brah das' mean.. but mines was mo' bettah.. I went dream we was crossing da' desert in one lunch wagon full of grinds!".

Da' Podagee guy said, "Nah brah, my dream was da' bes! I went dream we had one car door!".

Da Japanee and Hawaiian guy asked, "Brah, what da hell you going do wit' one car door?", Da Podagee said, "Brah, when stay hot, all we gotta do is roll da' window down!".

I heard booga-booga do that one back in the days. but I think it started as a Polish joke back in the 60's

[Pomai]

Re: Going Loco for Logos

I looking for the tako bell logo. Anybody can either send 'um to me, or show me where to get it? It was great, but when I went back to get 'um, it no stay!!! Thank u!!!

Ask and you shall receive (and then some)...

[Pomai]

Re: Going Loco for Logos



Dis' would be da' menu:

• Choose your "shell": Crunchy or Raw
• Choose your toppings: Ogo or Limu Kohu (market price), Green or sweet Maui Onion, Mirin, Shoyu, Inamona (ground Kukui Nut), Hawaiian Salt, Hawaiian "Salsa" (Lomi Salmon)

Also get:
• Tako Gordita
• Takostada
• Tako Bell Grande (Dis one expensive menu item cause also get Ahi Poke inside da' buggah)

[Dale]

Re: Going Loco for Logos

Ask and you shall receive (and then some)...

Thank u!!! I am going post at work since I like da kine Taco Bell!!!

[adrian]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

Here's an actual quote from a walmart store on Kauai:

the best is in lihue wal mart---there are tons of filipino ppl living and working on kauai...

"customer service to toys"

uh if you flip or know flip you'll get it

(say it with a heavy flip accent)

[Jomundo_d]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

Just to show that humor is not just in hawaii:::A statesider went to Puerto Rico and ran into a friend he knew in New York. The statesider told his friend, "I landed in San Guan and took a taxi to your house." The Puerto Rican told him< "That's pronounced San Huan, J,s in Spanish are pronounded like H,s in English. The statesider continued by saying, "I didn't know that a town called fagardo (Fajardo) even existed in Puerto Rico. To which he was told, that's Fahardo Js are like Hs, remember". To which the statesider answered, "Hey what do I know I'm from New Hersey".

[Jomundo_d]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

Then there is the one about the woman who went to a pet shop to buy a parrot. As she browsed around the shop she spotted a cage covered with a cloth. She moved the cloth aside and saw the most beautiful parrot she had ever seen. The parrot was covered with plumes of different colors, reds and greens and blues most pleasing to the eye. She called the shop owner and told him that she wanted to buy that parrot. The owner looked at her and said, "Madam this parrot came from a house of ill repute, I am sure you don't want this parrot in your christian home, surely you can pick from other parrots here in the shop who do not speak in the language this parrot speaks. It would be most insulting to your household." The woman answered that she would train the parrot to speak correctly and she was going to buy the parrot. The propreitor looked askance and said, "Madam if that's the way you want it,OK, but be advised that I will not accept its return". The woman bought the parrot and took it homw with its covered cage.
The following morning, the woman removed the cage cover and went about her morning chores. The parrot looked around the house and said, "Hmm new house. Just then the woman" two daughters entered the room and the parrot said, "Wow new girls". Then the woman's husband came in to the room and the parrot said, "Ooh same Old Customers, How you doing George?".

An old Joke but one of my favorites.

[adrian]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

bump. I miss reading local jokes.

[craigwatanabe]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

A lone Filipino boy dressed in a pirate's costume rings a doorbell on Halloween. The lady opens the door and admires the keiki's outfit and says, "My what a wonderful costume but where are your buckaneers?

The puzzled boy looks at the lady and says, "On my Buckin' head!"



Here's another:

The boss hands Manuel a chain saw to cut down a few tall trees in his lot. He tells him to come back by lunch time for lunch.

Lunchtime passes and no Manuel. Finally at sunset a tired and frustrated Manuel arrives back at the boss' home. The puzzled boss asks Manuel why he didn't come back at lunchtime?

Manuel says, "Ho Boss someting stay dakine broken with your saw but I wen cut em down like you say!" The boss looks at the chainsaw and pulls the starter cord...Brapppppaa brappppaaappppaaa! The saw comes alive.

"HO WAT DAT SOUND!!!" shouts a surprized Manuel!

[1stwahine]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

This is a TRUE Story. It happened this morning in Kalihi.

Waitress: Aloha! May I help you, Sir?

Customer: Uh, uhhh... I like orda one uhhh..Loco Moco.

Waitress: Yes, Sir. Anything else?

Customer: Uhhhh....I like ummm with RICE !!!!!

Waitress: Sir, Anywhere you go - when you order a Loco Moco it's automatic! DUH!

Auntie pUpUle

[Leo Lakio]

Re: Local Jokes and Humor of Hawaii

Did you ever notice...?

...men in Hawai`i don't mind being called "bra," but don't call 'em "panty."